In fair Granby where we set our scene...
I'm one of these girls who has been carrying the same purse for years. In fact, it's not even a purse. It's more of a satchel I guess. About 7 years ago, my brother gave it to me for Christmas. It's a North Face, magnetic-closure bag. I immediately fell in love with this thing that enabled me to lug around my junk while keeping my hands free. It's just big enough to hold my wallet, camera, chapstick and some interchangeable accessories (ipod, hat/gloves etc). It's sporty. Once I received it, I never looked back.
That is, until last year. Last June, my brother got married. She's an incredible SIL and I love her like crazy. She's fun, caring, compassionate, hard-working on-and-on-and-on. She's also quite fashionable (like, catalog-worthy)...and outspoken. In making one of the many trips back to Omaha in preparation for the wedding, she called me out on my little satchel. "When are you going to get a real purse?" she said to me. Huh. She said this in teasing (sort of) and with a sly grin but I knew somewhere in there, she was serious.
Was I using a kids bag? Was I so "sporty" that the femininity had been sucked from my wardrobe? Had I lost the balance between fashion and function? Did I care?
When I flew in for the the wedding weekend, my first stop was to find a more appropriate way to carry around my things. I found a more fashion-conscious hobo bag to accompany me to the festivities. I bought it, not because it really matters one way or another to me, but because I knew my SIL would prefer that I arrive in my black satin cocktail dress, black patent-leather wedge footwear and baubles...without my old North Face shoulder slinger. As I pulled up to the rehearsal dinner, I walked a little taller, knowing she would approve of my new purchase. It was a sort of wedding-gift-in-jest. She noticed right away.
Now I have both bags. I use them for different occasions, channeling the SIL voice in my head for dressier events while still using my old standby when the desire for function supersedes. No one I spend time with really cares what I throw my junk into but lately I've been thinking about the greater implications for identity and stuff.
We wear many hats, and carry many purses, in our lives. Wives, mothers, girlfriends, mentors, business-partners, outdoors-women etc. We are often expected to "have it all together" for all aspects of our personalities. We are expected to have event-specific handbags for goodness sake. I've heard men say they'd love a woman who can look smokin' in the little black dress while also being adventurous enough to hold her own on a ski slope...backpacking trip...rock climb. In all honesty, we probably look for the same versatility in men. We watch for the briefcase, the purse/wallet, the backpack, the fanny-pack (oy!). We use these thing to identify others, to characterize them as "sporty," "superficial," "fashionable," "practical." None of us are any ONE of these things, but a combination of them all.
It's interesting when something as unimportant as a purse can force a look at the varied aspects of our personalities and culture. All of which, by the way, are alike in dignity.
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